Alienation vs. Estrangement in South Jordan and Utah: Understanding the Differences and Their Impact on Child-Parent Relationships

Understanding the distinctions between alienation and estrangement is crucial for parents navigating custody disputes in South Jordan and throughout Utah. Both terms involve a child’s negativity toward a parent, but the causes and implications of each are different.

What is Alienation?

Alienation occurs when a child exhibits unjustified negativity toward one parent, often due to the influence of the other parent. This negativity arises from one parent making disparaging comments about the other in the child’s presence, leading the child to internalize and act on these negative beliefs.

Symptoms of Alienation:

1. The child repeatedly complains about the alienated parent.
2. The child provides frivolous rationalizations for their complaints.
3. The child views one parent as entirely good and the other as entirely bad.
4. The child asserts that their negative statements are made independently, without parental influence.
5. The child automatically sides with the non-alienated parent.
6. The child disregards the alienated parent’s feelings.
7. The child repeats stories and sentiments expressed by the non-alienated parent.
8. The child’s negative feelings extend to the family and friends of the alienated parent.

References:

• Bala, Fidler, Saini, Johnston, Parenting Plan Evaluations: Applied Research for the Family Court 345-375 (2nd ed. 2016)
• Amy J. L. Baker & S. Richard Sauber, editors, Working with Alienated Children and Families: A Clinical Guidebook 62 (2013).

What is Estrangement?

Estrangement, in contrast, involves a child’s justified negativity towards a parent. This negativity is typically a response to the parent’s neglectful or abusive behavior.

Causes of Estrangement:

• Child abuse
• Domestic violence within the household
• Coercive control (over the parent, child, finances, healthcare, and access to friends)
• Unmanaged emotions (e.g., screaming at the child, blaming, or throwing objects)
• Lack of an attachment relationship (e.g., minimal or no contact with the child by choice)
• Ineffective, incompetent, or uninvolved parenting

References:

• Bala, Fidler, Johnston, Parenting Plan Evaluations: Applied Research for the Family Court 345-375 (2nd ed. 2016)
• William Bernet & Demosthenes Lorandos, Parental Alienation: Science and Law 210 (2020).

Steps to Take If You Are Being Alienated in Utah

Experiencing alienation from your child can be incredibly frustrating and disheartening. However, there are legal avenues available in Utah to address and mitigate these behaviors.

Using a Motion for Temporary Orders in South Jordan

A motion for temporary orders can outline the responsibilities and behaviors of parents during the interim period before a divorce or paternity case is finalized. To prevent parental alienation, it is essential to include specific language that prohibits alienating behaviors, such as making negative comments about the other parent in the presence of the child.

Action Plan:

1. Hire an experienced family law attorney in South Jordan or Utah.
2. Draft a motion for temporary orders that includes prohibitions against alienating behaviors.

Using a Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) in Utah

A Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) is a court order that temporarily prohibits specific actions by a party. In the context of parental alienation, a TRO can be used to prevent a parent from engaging in behaviors that alienate the child from the other parent.

Action Plan:

1. Consult with a family law attorney in Utah.
2. Draft a TRO that includes language prohibiting alienating actions.

Conclusion

Distinguishing between alienation and estrangement is vital for addressing the underlying causes of a child’s negativity toward a parent. While alienation stems from one parent’s influence, estrangement arises from a parent’s neglect or abuse. Both require different approaches to address effectively. Legal measures, such as motions for temporary orders and temporary restraining orders, can help mitigate alienating behaviors and protect the parent-child relationship. Consulting with an experienced family law attorney in South Jordan or anywhere in Utah is crucial in navigating these complex issues and ensuring the best outcome for all involved.